My Life Is One Great… LOVE FIASCO πŸ’žπŸ’•πŸ’˜πŸ’“

Being someone’s first love maybe great, but being their last is beyond perfect!

-Unknown

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We all long to find our other half. That one person to spend the rest of our lives with; the person that’s our best friend, partner in crime and confidant. Someone to grow old with and share endless love. For everyone that’s found that, I am super jealous! but at the same time happy for you! 😊 Cherish that person because a love like that is rare.

My track record for my love life isn’t the best. Actually it really sucks. I am still searching for that person to swoop me off my feet; both literally and metaphorically. With that being said I might not be the best person to actually give love advice lol. I’ve had boyfriends but honestly I don’t think I’ve ever been in love with any of them. My first boyfriend I gave my heart and he made me paranoid the entire relationship. I was literally on edge just waiting for the bomb to drop. We were both young and in high school and I just don’t think we knew what we wanted from a relationship. When I think about it, its sort of sad we no longer talk because he’s a really great guy. My second boyfriend, well it didn’t take much for me to figure out that we weren’t meant to be. Our relationship shouldn’t be striving on a empty promise, and threats that he could leave for another girl if he wanted. The non-existent sex was really putting a strain on the relationship as well. But it was the best decision I’ve made to not lose my virginity to him. HE WAS A STRAIGHT ASSHOLE! Cheated on me the whole time with my friend. While in college, I almost fell in love with this guy. He was a little older but he didn’t have any kids. So I was like ‘yes! no baby mama drama to deal with’. We talked and spent a lot of time with each other for months. I felt I could confide in him about anything and that’s very rare. Naturally, I would do a thorough background check, you know the typical social media stalking (Facebook, Instagram, Twitter). But this guy was good, like I knew the password to his phone and never once I picked up any indication that he had a fiancΓ©. NOTHING! Since that relationship I’ve become very guarded. I haven’t been in an actual relationship after that but gone on a few dates and definitely met a few crazies. For a hopeless romantic like myself it actually sucks to be constantly putting myself out there and getting nothing but duds. You almost begin to wonder if you are the one with problem. Like am I asking too much for a guy to actually just respect me and get to know me. I definitely don’t think that’s too much. I am the type of person that’s searching  for an emotional connection and its extremely frustrating when I  am constantly presented  with the option of sexists and infidels. Sigh.

Anyways they say good things come to those who wait. And since being the go-getter hasn’t been working out in my favor I am just going to take that advice and hope that I am not waiting for too long.

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